Autistic adult Jim Sinclair has written eloquently on the subject of parents who mourn for their autistic children. Sinclair says:
“You didn’t lose a child to autism. You lost a child because the child you waited for never came into existence. That isn’t the fault of the autistic child who does exist, and it shouldn’t be our burden. We need and deserve families who can see us and value us for ourselves, not families whose vision of us is obscured by the ghosts of children who never lived. Grieve if you must, for your own lost dreams. But don’t mourn for us. We are alive. We are real. And we’re here waiting for you.”
(what a coincidence....just got a spontaneous hug from my little love....rarely happens, and it's sure not a TIGHT hug:) but it's awesome.